Fowl Letters
by cloudseeker6729
Summary: Write a reveiw to Artemis and he will answer it. Rated T to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so this is like Pixiebaby's story. I will be doing whatever Artemis says in this statement, sent directly from Artemis.**

**Disclaimer: I,***** ******, hereby do not own Artemis Fowl.**

Dear Lovers of Me,

I, Artemis Fowl, am now accepting fan-mail. If you have a question review this story in letter form addressed to me, and I will answer your questions. Cloudseeker6729 here will contact me with the information and I will answer to the best of my abilities.

Sincerely,

Artemis Fowl

**So review for Artemis.**

**Thanks,**

**cloudseeker6729**


	2. First letter's

**Okay so let's start. You ready Artemis? Ah yes the disclaimer. **Disclaimer: I am not Colfer nor could I write something as good as Artemis Fowl and I don't own anybody.

**From: CaptionHollyShort16**

_Hi __Arty! I just wanted to know, do you even read fanfictions? If you do,  
>whats your favorite story?<em>

_Love Forever,_

_CaptainHollyShort16_

**Artemis' Reply:**

Dear CaptainHollyShort16,

May I call you Captain? I sometimes do if I am not planning world domination. My favorite story is... Most of the ones that don't absolutely suck.

Sincerely,

A. Fowl II

**From:**

**AnimeMomo**

**so Artemis you don't have a girlfriend are you gay?**

**Artemis' Reply:**

Dear AnimeMomo,

Of coarse I'm not gay. I actually have a girlfriend. Her name is ***** *****. She is very beautiful.

Sincerely,

A. Fowl II

**From: Astrid-Elizabeth-Dare**

**Dear Artemis Fowl,**

**How has your relationship with your father been since you saved him from the  
>mafia? Was it different while you had no memories of the People?<strong>

**Sincerely,**

**Astrid Elizabeth Dare**

**Artemis' Reply**

Dear A.E.D.,

It actually got better because he is a better man now. The only bad thing about that was there was no more stealing. It didn't change while I had no memories of the People.

Sincerely,

A. Fowl II

**From: Epic Mickeygirl**

**Dear Artemis,**

**I mean he is basically an alter ego that feels all emotions torwards Holly  
>that you deny...so how do you cope with him and how do you make sure he<br>doesn't do somthing stupid?**

**Sincerely,**

**Epic MickeyGirl**

**Arty's Reply:**

Dear Epic,

I have no clue what you are talking about._ *__**whisper's to me***_ Oh you mean Orion. He's okay. He kind of has started to slip into my own mind again. I guess that means I like Holly. Oh and to answer your other question, he is a lovesick romantic, but he's not stupid.

Sincerely,

A. Fowl II


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay sorry for the wait but I only had 2 reviews/letters. Now I have three so I will be updating. Next time I want at least five. Disclaimer: I don't even have a copy of the books.**

From: Pepsicola56

dear artemis,

do you watch NCIS? if you do who is youre fave charicter? ~Hana~ 

Artemis' Reply:

_Dear Hana,_

_No, I don't have time for such lame shows(no offense but I had to block the question somehow. I don't even watch anything like that.) ***glares at me*** Thank you for that long comment._

_Sincerely,_

_A._

From: Holly Swift

Dear Artemis:

From your point of view, what's it like having an alter-ego? I myself have one  
>(her name's Seria). I think it gets pretty confusing at times, but I've always<br>wanted to know what another person thinks of it. Care to give us an insight?

Sincerely,

Holly D. Swift. 

Artemis' Reply:

_Dear Miss Swift,_

_ Well as you know having an alter-ego is pretty tiring. Orion is gone so I don't want to remember him as much as I have to._

_Sincerely,_

_A.F. II_

From: Juno

Hello Artemis Fowl,

In advance, I'm sorry for any faults. I'm French and just half bilingual.

Now, I have many questions for you :

1)Did your little brothers (when they was really really young) throw up when  
>they were happy ? Even if not, did they (or did you think they) threw up on<br>you when your mother put them in your arms for the first time ?

2)Could you sell your soul for orange juice ?

3)What kind of torture you think Butler use on me if I treat you of... pustule  
>anti-philanthropic ? (take it only has a supposition)<p>

4)Are you vexed when peoples take you has a Dracula's reincarnation or a Blues  
>Brothers ?<p>

Bye now,

Juno 

Artemis' Reply:

_Dear Juno,_

_ My little brothers did not throw up on me. They were 1and a half by the time I met them. I do not like orange juice and I think you meant Would not Could. Uhm... it is probely illegal so I won't tell you. No I am not vexted by it at all, though inside I am laughing._

_Sincerely,_

_A.F. II_

From: Ninja-curry-girl

Dear Artemis,

Have you ever watched a TV show called Doctor Who? I think you might take a  
>liking to that show.<p>

Love,

Ninja 

_Dear Ninja-curry-girl,_

_ I haven't heard of that show in the U.S. I am currently staying with my cousin(_that's how I met Artemis)_. _

_Sorry,_

_A.F. II_

**Okay now I'm done so review, review, review.**

**Thanks,**

**Cloudseeker6729**

**P.S. I won't update for about two weeks. I am really busy with this big projects and fieldtrips.**


	4. AN

Hello everyone, after a long hiatus, my story Fowl Letters will restart soon….I will begin by doing the reviews that I have not answered so it may be a long wait.

-cLoud


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N Well it has been a long time but I haven't forgotten this:**

**I Don't Own It**

**Alright Please Continue...**

Dear Artemis

What do you think about the goddess 'Juno' ?

What are we exactly feel when a fairy mesmerize us ?

Do you know the animated television serie 'Daria'? She really looks like you by many points of view.

What is the book you're actually re or re-reading ?

I don't know how the English (or Irish ?) school system works, but what living language have you choose in option ?

What do you think about world domination by the Wild Planet Zipotron's Puppets ?

Do you know the Runaways ? Do you like their songs ?

What are your all times favourites movies ? (for myself, it's 'Shaun Of The Dead' and many, many others)

Bye, and sorry to annoy you with my silly/strange questions

Juno

Dear Juno,

Well in my opinion the goddess Juno is just a myth. When a fairy mesmerizes us, we just feel an extreme need to follow the "voice" and that whatever the "voice" tells us to do is right. No, I have not heard of the TV series, 'Daria', though if she is anything like me, it must be a great show. The book I am reading currently is a Jack Reacher book. Butler introduced me to the series and I have been hooked ever since. No comment on world domination or the Runaways. My all-time favorite movie is definitely Star Wars The Return of the Jedi. You can't go wrong with a classic.

Sincerely,

II

Dear Arty,

What is your favorite book? Besides that one about the gold...

Love,

Silents

Dear Silents,

Currently my favorite book is Jack Reacher One Shot. What is yours?

Sincerely,

II

Dear esteemed Mr. Fowl II,

Are you a cat or dog person? Geniuses tend to lean more towards felines, I've heard.

Dear Whoever You Are,

You're assumption is correct in the fact that Geniuses tend to lean more towards felines. However, I am neither a cat or dog person, I am in fact a monkey (or to be precise, lemour) person.

Next time leave your name,

II

Dear Artemis,

Okay, before I ask you anything I want to ask you to not chatsie (not 100% sure I spelled that corrextly) my grammatical errors. I get enough of that from mother. Okay! On with the questions:

1 do you ever wish for a little sister?

you go to church?

's your favorite movie?

's your middle name? Someone told me it was Alexander.

Thanks! Oh and you cann call me victory ( that's what my name means)

Dear Victory,

No, I have never wished for a little sister and yes, I do go to a Catholic church but not on a regular basis, (when I am not busy saving the world). My favorite movie is Star Wars The Return of the Jedi and my middle name is in fact Alexander

You are Welcome,

II

Well I've done about half of the old reviews so hopefully I get some more… Next chapter is finished and I will put it up some time later today or tomorrow

-cLoud


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